Oh, facebook

[hazliya]

I got another one of "those" messages.

The body of it?

----

[no subject]
Between You and Biz Heffna

hii was up girl how u doing i seen ur profile and i thought u was looking reallliiiii cute so i wanna get to know u and be friends maybe chill sometimes..if u wanna get to know me holla back @ me k

----

Oh, man. I cannot even begin to describe how much is wrong with that. The trouble is, I get a lot of messages like this one - but this is on the pretty bad end of it. Grammatically speaking, that is. It's like he went out of his way to spell horrifically.

Even worse, here's his profile picture.

"Biz Heffna?" Looks like he's trying to be a badass, with the scary facial expression and WordArt of his name. Hate to tell you, Mr. Hefner (assuming that's what you were going for), but anyone who spells "really" as "realli!" usually dots their "i"s with little hearts and writes on scented stationery. Whoops!

I should make a facebook "Wall of Shame."

-Haz

Comments

[witeoutking.livejournal.com]

Oh my good lord. Wow.

[hazliya.livejournal.com]

Even WORSE was the mental image I had after the fact that a guy trying to be gangsta was writing like a teenybopper:

A girl, dressed like a cheerleader (complete with blonde pigtails) whips out a .22 covered in pink rhinestones and glittery hearts.
"I blinged up my piece, yo! *giggle, twirl hair* Like, where all my bitchiz at?"

[witeoutking.livejournal.com]

"Bitch, you KNOW I can't go anywhere in this skirt, it makes my damn ass look fat! Bitchez oughtta respect my fine ass when I'm wearing pink!"

[rigel.livejournal.com]

Why U gotta get all up in a brotha's grill, yo?

*titters*

[shadohrt.livejournal.com]

Just don't peek into socialmoth.
The horrible spelling, bad grammar and general language butchering will hurt your head.